Pregnant and dealing w/ future MIL who invited ex gf that fianc'e cheated on me with to funeral?

I had a funeral to attend for fianc'e mom's side. I helped out the best I could by getting the deceased outfit together and spending many hours making a photo collage (tri-fold- like a big scrapbook page.) This was to be my fianc'e mom's job- but i took it of her plate.I kept out select photos that would involve any embarassing past moments/loves. And all photos dealing with potential infidelity of the deceased.





Well- at the funeral turns out his mom invited past gf that he cheated on my with. Yes she knows- she was on the trip- and this was to a special place for the both of us- so I thought. He lied all about it and who she was- but I have photos the mom took of them in the hot tub- her in the bed- their hands all over each other. Very hurtful.





This is not the first time the woman has shown up at family functions. Is a heads up too much to ask?





Partner thinks I should suck it up and put on a happy face and deal with it/ get over it. I asked him how everyone would feel if I had invited the said person in the photos or used any of those? Should they suck it up and get over it. I just wanted some understanding- yet I could not even find him when she was there all that time- finally did- with his mom.





Future MIL has done many hurtful things to me in the past. (Borderline illegal things.) And I thought as we went through all those photo albums that things would be different. Yet still I remained guarded- as she seems to always back-stab me somehow.





Oh- and BTW I am pregnant and really not feeling well at all. :p





I understand the future MIL can have whom she pleases to make her feel better. Just to let me know would have been nice. Or to even say she meant to or ??? Yes, and pregnancy hormones do make me feel nutso sometimes .. :0





So what is the best way to deal with this type of thing? TU.Pregnant and dealing w/ future MIL who invited ex gf that fianc'e cheated on me with to funeral?
Your fiance should have made it clear to his mother that the woman he cheated on you with was not to be asked to come. If she came of her own free will, she has a lot of balls in my opinion, and she's a word I won't say on here. Future MIL is an effing beotch and should be kicked in the shin every time you see her, along with your fiance! First, you're pregnant. Stress is not good for you and your baby. That's one reason to get that woman out of your face. If MIL needs her to make her feel better,she should have enough respect for you to let her console her out of your presence. Second, for finace to say to ';suck it up';....I would have punched him in the face. If he won't tell his mother to stop asking his ex skank to functions, then I wouldn't marry this piece of crap anyhow. Sounds like a Momma's boy who has no clue outside of what she tells him. I'm not saying he's cheating right now, but any man with a conscience would make sure that woman was no where around ya'll. MIL sounds like a real piece of work, too. I bet she still has pictures up of your fiance and his ex, too. RUN away from this messed up family as quickly as you can. You'd hate to be married to the guy and having his ex sitting across from you at the dang table at Thanksgiving! Sorry you have to go through this.Pregnant and dealing w/ future MIL who invited ex gf that fianc'e cheated on me with to funeral?
Funerals are not an invitation occasion.





People attend to pay respect to the family and deceased.





No invitation required.
I would not allow these people to be a part of my life. They're too messed up starting with that fiance who cheated.
don't go to her events. tell your fiance to make a choice.
Sounds like a freaking nightmare to me..


I wouldn't marry into that dysfunction with a gun to my head. Your MIL and your fiance are totally disrespectful to you and certainly don't seem to care how you feel.





Is that really what you want to live with the rest of your life? I know you're pregnant but I'd still walk away from that one. What about your family? Do you get support from them?
She was really out of line for doing that. The pictures also, completely unnecessary. Do you guys get along or have you ever gotten along since you've been with him? Even if you weren't pregnant, wrong is wrong. Fiance should also be supportive and respect the fact that you're with him now and you should have some say as to what you're going to be subjected to.
I do not think i would marry into this family! i have ML problems and i hate it! the women used to display photos of my husband and his ex after we got married i used to think that was crazy. But my husband agreed with me and understood. he never made me feel i should deal with it. so i am sorry your man is telling you that. I am sure you love your future husband, but think about this! if his family is not respecting you now, how are they going to treat you and any future children you have. I dont think they care about your feelings and I do not think you would find a happy life with in this family. For you to do so much for her and then treat you back like this and then for them all to say just deal with it is not fair to you! NOT FAIR! i would take a serious minute to think if you would like to deal with this for the rest of your life or possibly find a family where you are embraced. Before you marry him really really think about this. Marriage is a big thing and there are ML who can embrace their sons women! I do not think your can if she is not now she probably will not.
Your future mother in law doesn't NEED your permission to invite someone to be a part of HER family gatherings. She doesn't HAVE to consult you. The best way to deal with it is to get over yourself and grow up, the world doesn't revolve around you.