How do I know if I'm ready?

K, background. I'm divorced. I was seperated from the end of February until almost the end of October when it became final. I've dated casually a little, had some physical relationships, etc. I've reconnected with a very old friend now. And so far, it's been only friendship, like back in the day lol. Until lately. He's started making comments, opening up and telling me that he has feelings for me and that he has for a while, even way back when.


The thing is, my divorce was caused by my husband's infidelity, and numerous affairs. I went through a lot during my marriage, and still continue to deal with the bs resulting from it.


I'd like to see where this thing goes, but I'm so scared that I won't be able to trust him. Not because he's a bad guy, but just because I find it so hard to trust now. And I don't want to risk hurting him if I find that I just don't have that trust.


So, how do I know when I'm ready? What are the signs that I've dealt with it sufficiently enough to open myself back up to that kind of commitment and trust level? So confused right now....How do I know if I'm ready?
Hi! Well right off the bat i can tell you're not ready now. You said that you're dealing with trust issues and what not from your previous relationship. And honey that is sooo 100% understandable. I think its great that ur able to admit that ur still dealing with things bc at least u know where u stand. Coming from a situation myself of infidelity i can assure you that it will stick with u for some time even after u think u've resolved this inner struggle. Without going off on a rant here (and i can lol) you'll know u r ready when u are able to put your heart on the line again fully dissolved of any of mistrust. when u begin to realize that losing this new man is not a price you're willing to pay for your jealousy or mistrust.In the end its either those issues or having him on your life. If u go into this too quickly u risk hurting him and disappointing yourself. Some of the signs that u are moving on i would have to say are when the trust issues that u r dealing with now do not arise when they normally would have. when you u catch yourself trusting again when u normally wouldnt you are on your way. In the end if youre dead serious and intent on going about it the complete way id look for counseling....its for YOUR happiness. Good luck!How do I know if I'm ready?
You will be ready when u put the past behind u.
Just take it slow with him. Don't punish him for what your husband did, but be careful.
WOW.


Unfortunately, life does not have a handbook!





Take it SLOW..get to know yourself, and enjoy time being alone. If this guy truly wants and loves you, he will wait and play by your schedule.





Trust me, I know it sucks ****, but space is what think you both need for awhile. I've been there and done that with a similiar situation....I messed it up by jumping in too quick cause i thought he was ';the one';.





Don't let your lack of trust rule, but don't let it screw you over either.





ARG. Trust him, but DON'T trust him. Life is funny, and a big *** contradiction, huh?.





best wishes honey. ;)